Ofie'z Space

The other day my mom read my English journal and started lecturing me.

“That’s not literary. Your writing is too sixth-graderish. You can write like a tenth grader, and you should. “She wore a white dress to the party” can become “She appeared at the party, her slim figure sheathed in a gown of dazzling white.””

Alright. I succumbed, and put more effort into my sentences.

“Stefan scored a goal.” became

“Stefan stepped back, in a split second mentally calculating the distance, angle and power required. Out of honed experience, his instincts born of a thousand moments like these kicked in, and like an automaton, out of nowhere he launched his right foot hard at the ball. Swooping into the air in a perfect arc, the ball glinted in the light a brief moment and whizzed into the far corner of the net, as the crowd roared with delight. He had saved the game!”

Impressed? Haha.

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